not your pee

Dear Chicken Nugget,

As a public school teacher, I've seen my share of accidents in the classroom.  In fact, today I had a kid pee his pants.  I thought I would be more OK with it than I was considering that for the last 21 days I've been changing diapers like a pro.  I've been peed on, pooed on and, just a minute ago, spit up on.  By you.

Side note: "Spit up" is just a cuter term for vomit.  Still even baby vomit is cuter than kindergarten bathroom accidents.  At least I think so.

My very first classroom bathroom accident happened on my very first day of teaching.  There I was, a 22 year old teacher with little training, surrounded by 26 second grade students.  I had been told by the veteran teachers around me that it was best to start the year acting as tough as possible.  I was told not to smile until March.

I had the students sitting on the rug and I was trying to get them to transition to their seats.  One student refused to move.  She said nothing and didn't budge.  I went into drill sergeant mode and dispatched the remaining students to their seats.  I acted tough.  I did not smile.  And I made the little girl cry.

I got louder.  Still, she didn't move.  When I finally got down to a crouch and spoke to her in a softer voice she said, "I had an accident."  Tough 22 year old me, the guy who wasn't going to smile until March, let out a little chuckle.  That made her smile a little too.  Then, I had to figure out what to do with the girl and the pee on my classroom rug.  I rushed to the door and called to the teacher across the hall for help.

Eight years later I still haven't been able to handle the pee or poo accidents at school gracefully.  And yet, I find myself dealing with them at home every day now.  Then again, this is what it looks like at home:

Knuffle Bunny keeps you company while we change your diapers

Pee away little one.  This I can handle.


Eternally yours,

Tu papa

Editor's note: A good friend pointed out that there is a difference between spit-up and vomit.  Spit-up is regurgitation of food, while vomit is the forceful expulsion of the contents of the stomach.  Still, if adults went around regurgitating their food as often as babies did, it would be disgusting.  With you, Nugget, it's still cute.  Keep on doing what you do.