your name

Dear Chicken Nugget,

As I type you are by my side taking a nap.  You and I are on the couch, each using the baseball blankie to cover our feet.  You are such a beautiful blessing to have in our lives.  I've only known you for three days and already I am completely in love with you.  So is your mother.

But this letter is not about us being in love with our Chicken Nugget, this letter is about your name.

We've gotten the same question several times over the last three days:  Where did Santiago Romeo come from?

This is our explanation:

Santiago (S-ahn-tee-ah-go) was the middle name of your great grandfather, my grandfather, Bolivar.  His full name was Bolivar Santiago Escudero.  He was a pretty incredible character who loved life from beginning to end.  He was born in Ecuador, was a part-time boxer when he was young, a tango singer, he could play the harmonica and the organ, was a father of eight children, and later in life, a proud American.  He lived to be 98 and passed away just last summer with your grandmother Betty, and your mom and I, by his side.

Romeo (Roh-meh-oh) was the original name of your great grandfather, your mom's grandfather, Paul.  His full original name was Romeo Tristan Scaramuzzi.  He is a very charismatic guy who has also lived a pretty incredible life.  He was born and raised in Brooklyn, shook hands with Babe Ruth, went to school with Jackie Gleason, and was a para-trooper during World War II.  He didn't see combat but served in Brazil where he picked up some Portuguese and Spanish.  He raised four children, including your grandma Sue, and now lives in Omaha, Nebraska with your great grandma Arleen.

We picked those two names in honor of our grandfathers.  And, we picked those names because we really like the way they sound in Spanish and Italian - which is how we're pronouncing them.

Plus, I think Santiago Romeo makes a great soccer player name.

We love you Santi and I hope your name treats you well.

Eternally yours,

Tu papa

Santiago Romeo is born

your mom, Wendy, and you, Santiago Romeo, our chicken nugget

Dear Chicken Nugget,

So, it turns out you look nothing like a chicken nugget!  We finally met you in person when you were born at home at 12:33pm on September 6th, 2010 - Labor Day (you have a great sense of humor, apparently).

We were six days over our due date but most first babies are a week and a day late.  Still, we tried everything that they say you should try to induce labor - walking, spicy foods, etc.  But, I'm happy to report that a family secret came through! 

Your great gradndma Lorene had rhubarb pie the day before your grandpa Dale was born.  Your grandma Sue had rhubarb pie the day before your Aunt Sara was born.  And, your Aunt Sara had rhubarb pie the day before your cousin Timothy was born.

We got lucky and our friends Kim and Jordan found a strawberry rhubarb pie at a farm in NJ and brought it over for us on Sunday.  Whoa!

Your mom's Braxton Hicks contractions became more regular throughout the day, coming as frequently as four in an hour, and then transitioned into "real" contractions at around 10pm Sunday night.  It was a little scary at first, trying to get my bearings, figuring out who to call, timing contractions, etc, but talking to our incredible midwife, Miriam Schwarzschild, put me at ease.  She told us to try and get some sleep and keep her updated. 

We "slept" as best we could but contractions were coming every five to thirteen minutes throughout the night.  Your mom slept through a series of them but mostly found herself nodding off in between contractions.  I slept when your mom slept and was awake when your mom was awake. 

When we finally got out of bed at 6:30am, contractions came on hard and fast - every four minutes.  By 7:30am when one of our doulas Dahlyt dropped by, the contractions were coming every two minutes. 

We got your mom into the birth tub and that seemed to slow things down for a bit.  Our second doula Paola came in to help.  Miriam, our midwife, came to assess the situation and she saw that your mom was in active labor. 

Your mom labored for five hours in the birth tub.  By 11:45am or so she started to push and by 12:33pm you came up from the water and looked into your mom's eyes.  You seemed confused about the eviction from your cozy studio apartment.  You weighed in at 5lbs15oz, measured 19.5 inches, and had a head full of dark hair.

We definitely could not have done this without the amazing support of our doulas, Dahlyt and Paola.  Whenever I needed to step away for whatever reason, they were there.  They knew so many comfort measures that your mom loved and were able to take lots of pictures for us.  They helped clean up, made us lunch, and made sure that your mom was all settled before they left. 

Miriam Schwarzschild, our midwife, was a rock.  Whenever I had any doubts I looked at Miriam and I knew that everything was under control and, even more, that things were going great.

Being a part of your birth was surreal, intense, and beautiful.  It's the hardest thing your mom has ever done and the hardest thing I've ever experienced with someone.  But, everything went incredibly well, you're healthy, and you're beautiful.

Of course, my hero forever is your mom.  She worked so hard for you.  She is the strongest person I know.  And I love her.  I know you do too.

Welcome to our world, nugget!  I love you!


Watching you nap,

Tu papa

my baseball blankie

Dear Chicken Nugget,

This morning was chilly here in NYC and I woke up and wrapped myself in a green baseball blankie I've had since I was seven.

The blanket was part of a bed set but only the blankie survived the years and many apartments.  It's not particularly pretty but it carries memories.  The blanket is grass green with a huge baseball player swinging a bat on a baseball diamond background, along with the logos of all the baseball teams that existed at the time - including the Montreal Expos.

The blanket may not be considered a collector's item but it's special to me.  I love that blanket.  It's yours as soon as you're old enough to have a big kid's bed.

In the meantime, I'll continue to treat it well and keep it from your mom's well-meaning hands (she has a tendency to want to wash the baseball blankie...really).


Yours eternally,

Tu papa

40 weeks in the belly

Dear Chicken Nugget,

Today you've been in the belly for 40 weeks - which means that today is your due date!  It's now almost 10pm, so unless you're taking the Express Train out, it seems Patrick Swayze was wrong.  That's OK.

Since your mom is a doula, she knows a lot about birth, including the fact that first pregnancies usually go a few days late.  The good news is, we know that you're probably going to be late, we're patient, your mom feels great, and we still love you.

You're probably the size of a small pumpkin now and have a good amount of hair.  Still, all the physical attributes I've written about so far have been straight up guesses.  We have no idea who you look like and won't know until you join us.

We love you and can't wait to meet you... whenever that is.


Eternally yours,

Tu papa

surprise date night

Dear Chicken Nugget,

Tonight your mom and I had a surprise date night.  We're going through a heat wave this week so it's been hitting the 90s.  And, as if to add the cherry on top, we might be getting some hurricane weather by the end of the week.

In any case, it was hot tonight and your mom and I decided to turn on the second air conditioner to help cool down the apartment.  The only major problem with our current apartment is that almost every electrical outlet is on the same line.  So, our two air conditioners use the same circuit.  I guess we had too many appliances plugged in and drawing power because when I turned on the television it all went black.

The apartment heated up rather quickly and the landlord, the only one with access to the circuit breaker, was out.  So, your very pregnant mom and I decided to go out for a surprise date night.

We started at the Astoria Brewhouse where we sat at the bar and played Scrabble (note: your very pregnant mom did not partake in the Happy Hour special).  After an hour of enjoying a board game and air conditioning we headed out in search of a meal.  We ended up at Bareburger and shared a couple of burgers and a mixed salad (because you have to throw something healthy into the meal).

We had a nice, slow stroll home and were thrilled to find that the electricity was back on.  It ended up being a completely unplanned date night.

So, in the end, losing power for a few hours was a blessing.  I'm glad it happened.  We're glad you're happening soon.


Eternally yours,

Tu papa

on donating blood

Dear Chicken Nugget,

Today I went to the NY Blood Center to donate blood.  It's something I started doing about three years ago, two to four times a year, to help out our local blood banks.  In a city of about 8 million people, something like 60% are eligible to donate blood but only less than 5% actually do so.  That means that in a city of 8 million people full of illness, accidents, and surgeries, there's almost always a shortage of blood.

I tell you this because I feel it's our duty as healthy adults to do what we can to help others in need.  I hope that, when you get older and meet the eligibility requirements for donors, you help people by giving some blood.

I have seen family members who were sick and needed blood transfusions.  I saw them get blood and watched them feel better, if even for just a little bit.  When you give blood you may be helping a cancer patient who needs a blood transfusion to help them feel better.  You may be helping someone in a traumatic car accident who needs an emergency transfusion.  You may be helping babies that were born prematurely and need transfusions to help them gain strength.

Or, you may be helping someone like your great grandfather Bolivar, who at the age of 98 was very ill, fatigued, and confused.  The doctors told us that they were going to give him some blood to help a low red blood cell count.  The way my mom describes it, it's as if they gave him the blood of a young bull.  Within minutes he was up, trying to walk out of bed, telling jokes, and asking for food; he was hungry.

Although, the blood transfusion didn't "cure" my grandpa, it helped him feel better.  And, it gave my family a few more waking, lucid moments with grandpa.

God-willing you will grow up to be a healthy young adult and will be willing to endure a couple of pinches so that you can help others in need.  My hope is that there are others who will do the same.


Loving you, always,

Tu papa

Wearing my Grumpy Pants

Dear Chicken Nugget,

As I write this I'm waking up from a nap.  In the future your mom may caution you to stay away from me as I re-enter the waking world.  In fact, she's learned to ignore me until I speak first.  Apparently when I wake up from naps, I'm often wearing what your mom calls my "grumpy pants" - whatever that means.

After four-something years together your mom has learned to read me and will know by just a glance that I'm upset with the world.

Just so you know, I'm not really upset with the world or anyone in it.  I just happen to enjoy sleeping.  I enjoy the deep peace of a siesta and the bizarre action-packed dreams that frequently come with it. 

Waking up often feels like I'm being yanked from paradise.  One minute I'm in a profound slumber fighting zombies (and winning) on the beaches of Cancun, Mexico and the next I'm waking up on the couch, wickedly thirsty, and realizing that I forgot to go to the supermarket to buy stuff for dinner.  So, yes, sometimes I wake up in a wee bit of a bad mood.

Your mom claims that as I roll out of my naps I growl like bear.  I swear there are actual sweet words of love coming out of my mouth - maybe your mom has a hearing problem.

I have learned recently that getting to work on something immediately after a nap often helps soften the blow to the helpless bystander.  For example, writing this entry has helped get me out of my "grumpy pants."  I'm not sure if it's because it's given me time to focus on something other than the fact that I was painfully pulled away from a beautiful rest or if its because I'm thinking about you.

If it is you that is helping my post-hibernation depression then be prepared to be used as a human shield.  I'm pretty sure your mom will use you to disarm the drooling papa bear that rolls menacingly off the couch.

Hopefully it works.


Yours eternally,

Tu papa

39 weeks in the belly

Dear Chicken Nugget,

Today you've been in the belly for 39 weeks!

We're getting so close to meeting you and the excitement is almost unbearable.  The apartment is clean, your crib, co-sleeper, clothes, and diapers are all ready to go.  We're just waiting on you.  

You're probably about the size of a small watermelon and running out of space.  You're fully mature and just packing on some baby fat.

We can't wait to see what you look like.  Come out to play; the party is on the outside!


Eternally yours,

Tu papa

Be the best

Dear Chicken Nugget,

I haven't written about this yet, but I have a side project from my regular teaching career.  I am an Arbitration Advocate.  I help represent colleagues from the teachers' union and try to get them their jobs or benefits back.

I've been thinking a lot about this and it's one of those jobs where you have to be your best all the time.  Much like teaching.  And, a lot like parenting, I imagine.

In an arbitration hearing someone's career may be at stake.  In teaching, there's 25 kids wanting to learn.  And as a parent, there's you.  You're going to demand the best, I will do my best to be the best, or more.

If I should fall short on occasion, I'll have your mom by my side to whip me back into shape.  I fully expect parenting to be hard and I can't wait to take it on.

And, when the time comes, I hope to lead by example and help you be the best at whatever it is you want to be the best at.


Trying my best,

Tu papa

I am a Spartan!

Dear Chicken Nugget,

Today I completed The Spartan Race.  Your dad is a Spartan (at least according to some race organizers who made loads of money off wannabe weekend warriors).

Your mom came out to cheer and my friend, Bob, came out to race as well.  It was a fun race with 14 obstacles.  I climbed an 8-foot wall with no help (though it did take a couple of tries).  I ran up and down sand dunes.  I climbed a cargo net, hopped some 4-foot hurdles, and crawled through mud under barbed wire.  There was also some spear throwing, wall climbing sideways, and climbing a greased wall.  Oh, and there was the part where two huge guys dressed as Spartans tried to beat me with padded jousting sticks right before crossing the finish line.

I hope they keep this race around long enough that you'll be able to join me.  I'd love to run alongside you.  And then one day, we can both be Spartans.  Together.


Prepare for glory,

Tu papa

37 weeks in the belly!

Dear Chicken Nugget,

Today you have been in the belly for 37 weeks.  Which means that you are considered "full-term"!  You can be born now and not be considered a preemie.

You weigh about 6 1/3 lbs and are about as long as a stalk of swiss chard. 

We have no idea what you look like and we're anxious to meet you!  Your mom and I are also looking forward to knowing if you are a boy or a girl and giving you a name.  We have a short list of names picked out and when you are born, we'll look at you and talk to you and together the three of us will decide what you'll  be named. 

So, you can technically be born anywhere from five hours to five weeks from now.  Take as much time as you need.  We're ready for you!


Love you always,

Tu papa

Some sing, some dance

Dear Chicken Nugget,

Your mom and I just got back from Bloomington, Illinois where we celebrated your great grandparents' 70th anniversary.  Yes, 70th anniversary!  Louis and Lorene Miller have been married for 70 years. 

The whole Miller clan showed up in Bloomington to celebrate the occasion, including your grandparents, Sue and Dale, your tia Sara and tio Jerry and your primo Timothy.  Overall there must have been over 30 people celebrating this weekend.

Something you'll learn as you get to know your families (mine and your mom's) is that they celebrate differently.  They do some things the same like eat.  Both families do a good job of gathering over meals and eating well.  You'll always be well-fed, Chicky.

But, the Millers are musical - they sing and play instruments.  The Escuderos (my family) dance.  So this weekend, the Millers pulled out song sheets and sang around a piano.  And, they sang beautifully.  They sang songs from the 1940s when your great grandparents got married and they sang songs of praise.

I pretended to join in during rehearsals, mouthing words and turning pages in the song book for your mom.  But really, I've been blessed with many great things, Nugget, and a good singing voice just isn't one of them.

The Miller Family Choir put on three performances at the Senior Homes where your great grandparents live.  They were wonderful!

I hope, dear Chicky, that you inherit a good singing voice so you can join them in song.  If marriage longevity is genetic, your mom and I are in it for the long haul and we'd sure love to hear some songs of celebration.

You are getting half of your genes from me though, so good luck with that voice.


Eternally yours,

Tu papa