Wearing my Grumpy Pants

Dear Chicken Nugget,

As I write this I'm waking up from a nap.  In the future your mom may caution you to stay away from me as I re-enter the waking world.  In fact, she's learned to ignore me until I speak first.  Apparently when I wake up from naps, I'm often wearing what your mom calls my "grumpy pants" - whatever that means.

After four-something years together your mom has learned to read me and will know by just a glance that I'm upset with the world.

Just so you know, I'm not really upset with the world or anyone in it.  I just happen to enjoy sleeping.  I enjoy the deep peace of a siesta and the bizarre action-packed dreams that frequently come with it. 

Waking up often feels like I'm being yanked from paradise.  One minute I'm in a profound slumber fighting zombies (and winning) on the beaches of Cancun, Mexico and the next I'm waking up on the couch, wickedly thirsty, and realizing that I forgot to go to the supermarket to buy stuff for dinner.  So, yes, sometimes I wake up in a wee bit of a bad mood.

Your mom claims that as I roll out of my naps I growl like bear.  I swear there are actual sweet words of love coming out of my mouth - maybe your mom has a hearing problem.

I have learned recently that getting to work on something immediately after a nap often helps soften the blow to the helpless bystander.  For example, writing this entry has helped get me out of my "grumpy pants."  I'm not sure if it's because it's given me time to focus on something other than the fact that I was painfully pulled away from a beautiful rest or if its because I'm thinking about you.

If it is you that is helping my post-hibernation depression then be prepared to be used as a human shield.  I'm pretty sure your mom will use you to disarm the drooling papa bear that rolls menacingly off the couch.

Hopefully it works.


Yours eternally,

Tu papa