This is Sparta!

Your dad and his buddies hanging out.

Dear Chicken Nugget,

Your dad suffers from a serious disease called Wannabe-Warrior Syndrome.  I recall suffering from this disease as early as elementary school.  My earliest memory of it was when I was ten years old and coming out of the theatre after watching the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie.  As I kicked imaginary enemies walking down the street, I thought that my calling in life was to be a hero or warrior. 

I grew older, wiser (well, wise enough to know that my hidden talent in life was not in the martial arts or any sort of fighting for that matter) but I still found a deep connection or longing to be strong and able to defend the defenseless.

Eventually this translated into stints in politics, thinking I was pre-Med, then pre-Law, then teaching.  But, the common thread through all this was a pull, or tug, to be able to stand up for what's right and kick ass while doing it.

Which leads me to where I am today: my seventh day of "Spartan Training."  I'll explain the 300 Spartan thing another time, but for now, just know that in the long history of human battle, there were once 300 Spartans who stood up to tens of thousands of Persians and inspired a nation to fight back an invasion and save democracy.  Great story.

In any case, there's a race being held on August 15th, 2010 called the Spartan Race where silly people like me are going to run a 5-kilometer race that involves jumping through fire, crawling through mud under barbed wire, climbing greased walls, and getting beaten with a stick.  And that's only four of the twelve obstacles I'll face.  The idea is to mimic, if even for just a little bit, some of the torturous fighting and training that the Spartans did back in their day. 

I'm training for the race because I think it sounds like an incredibly fun thing to do.  I'm also training for the race because it gives me a goal to help me get back into shape.  I am going to be in great shape when you arrive because I need to be.  Not just because of the race, but because you and your mom are going to need me to be healthy - and that's the ultimate reason to do what I'm doing.

Sure, you'll probably still catch me watching 300 and walking around the house pretending I'm slaying Persians left and right.  But, it's that crazy little Wannabe-Warrior Syndrome that keeps me getting back into shape when I fall out of it. 

I have you and your mom to motivate me to stay healthy and active.  And, I'll use those crazy hero stories to help inspire me off the couch.

So, if you ever see me standing in the middle of the living room and you hear me say, "Madness...?  This is Sparta!"  I suggest you either grab your shield and stand with me or run away 'cause it means daddy's having a relapse.

Eternally yours,

Tu papa